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Tuesday, 07 April 2009

심장이없어*!
"아프다고 말하면 정말 아플 것 같아서
슬프다고 말하면 눈물이 날 것 같아서
그냥 웃지 그냥 웃지 그냥 웃지
그런데 사람들이 왜 우냐고 물어

매일을 울다가 웃다가 울다가 웃는걸 반복해
나 왜 이러는데
술이 술인지 밥인지도 모르는 채
살아 이 정도 아픔은 통과 의례인 듯 해
멍하니 종이에 나도 몰래 니 이름만 적어 하루 왼 종일
종이가 시커매지고서야 펜을 놔
너 그리워 또 핸드폰을 들었다 놔
눈물이 또 찾아와 너와의 이별이란"

OH my FRIEnD!*
"세상이 그대를 슬프게 한다면 언제 어디서든 내 이름을 불러주오
난 항상 너만을 위한 119 5분 대기조 ye

그대가 가진 아픔은 아픔아냐 우릴 만나게 해 준 인연의 끈이야
내게 기대 울어도 좋아 아무말 없이 안아줄테니

나 널 위해 비를 맞아 쉬지 않고 달려가 거친 바람도 뚫고 지나 ye
네 뒤에 무거운 짐 어두운 그림자 이젠 내가 다 막아줄테니"

Friday, 06 March 2009

I stumbled upon this clip in the afternoon ! just when the
"Nobody" craze was bout to die away, K.Will did one
awesome r'nb cover to bring it all back to life ! in his
version, you can hear the desperation, feel the sadness
sweep over you and see the struggle for love !
the sentiments carried through to me are pretty personal !
without all the ultra retro pop beats that drowned out
most of the meaning in the original version of the song I
can finally take this and dedicate it to a part of my life !

"If there is a way, teach me to be selfless so that I do
not keep you for myself !
If there is a chance, teach me to be humble so that I
will realize I am far from perfect for you !
I will endure and face up to these teachings ! for me to let go !"

Monday, 09 February 2009

I got back home last night and spent the time
before I went to sleep to think and plan for
my future ! since I didn't think wisely enough
in my first year of uni I guess I can only opt
to work 3x as hard this year and juggle dance
in between ! If only I had been more
serious with either one when I had loads of
free time ! well I still dream of traveling
and working abroad ! anyways this year its
gonna be less talk and more jam packed
action ! nothing to lose !

Seeing some of my old and close friends
really helped me to make my decision !
Saturday I got to see a bunch of em over
at Yubo's apartment ! got called over by
Dennis and Rui and crashed at Rhodes
for massive hotpot ! we chilled and sorted
a few things out over dinner ! props out to
the girls Theresa and Lucy for fixing us up
with a great meal ! anyways I gotta clear
this with my friends ! somethings wont and
will never be sorted and thats how it ends !
what 'should be' stays in 'should land', in
reality, life is hard and peeps gotta face it !

Next morning I stayed home cleaning and
left the house in the afternoon for auditions
down at the city studio ! they were looking
for dancers who 'looked japanese' !
well I knew I was a dancer, looking jap
or not, I left that for the casting agents to
decide ! but jokes was on me when we
were told that instead of street styles we
had to do .... FLAMENCO rofl ! after the
shock, the day turned out well !

The following night I went down to D2MG
with the boys Ben, Chi and Jay for class !
after class I was told some insanely awesome
news ! but ! nothing is official as of yet so
I'll wait til things are a bit more solid to say !
chilled at KFC for a good while, and damn
have the chicken and potatoes gone
expensive ? why a meal costing almost $10
is beyond me ! fast foods meant to be cheap !
then we messed round downstairs shooting
some hoops til Ben won a prize ! I wanted
so badly to win but it'll have to wait !

Wednesday, 04 February 2009

So last week for me was a massive family fest !
had my sister, brother-in-law and my niece
visiting from HK ! and it was hella fun cause
I love it when the family is big and the house
suddenly shrinks in size ! and lucky for them the
week they came it was pretty cool in comparison
to the typical 30 something degree days that you
get down here in Sydney ! though at some places
I still ended up roasting my face !

My family have always been a source of inspiration
to me ! knowing that I have their support sometimes
I feel like I can take on anything ! and though these
days have been difficult I will continue to work hard
so that one day they can enjoy the fruits of my
labour ! fight on ! USH ! ... but since uni hasnt started
yet, I can afford to play just this month longer rofl !

Sunday, 18 January 2009

Internet is up and running ! swear to god TPG hates us ! need to find
better net provider ! even if it means costing my bro more money lol !
these days have been rather quiet and calm ! since my mum came back
I find myself spending most of my time smelling her cooking while
I hang out in front of the tele ! this was especially the case since the
net wouldnt work ! and well since the passing of a certain series of events
I find myself turned off by people and heaps unwilling to move
myself outta the doorstep ! exceptions of course are when I'm driving
marmee out for lunch or shopping !

Now let's go through some generics and establish that friends are humans
and most humans (if not all) are in the game for themselves, at least 99%
of the time ! now, that's cool and all cause hey, you should be playing
the game for yourself ! now you add in some jealousy and self-obsession
to a few of those people who you call friends, and you get a pack of
wolves behind your back ready to turn and ka-fuzzle your ass down
when you least expecting it ! and the rest will stand by while they
watch you get munched about and torn apart ! cause they have trouble
finding the courage to get themselves involved and all ! now I can't be
hating and all, cause I don't need to be rescued ! I can fend for myself !
and I definitely don't expect to have people fight my wars !
but the fact that they find it hard to even just step up and help give
a heads up as to what's coming cause they wanna be all peaceful
and shit, not get involved, all that stuff ! now that's just weak !
I brave scars all over my body now and take each one of em' as
a badge of honour ! these will now constantly remind me of
where friendships with some of you people stand ! I am no more
cynical than I ever was, but just a bit more wary of those who
stand alongside me ! I still have goals and aspirations to work for
so just understand that I'm a busy man ! don't be expecting lots
of love in return if you couldn't give in the first place !
though I'm human too and have the same game to play, just know
that my brothers and sisters, that we playing for the same team !

But on a cheerier note check out the Port Stephen photos lol !
puts a smile to the face ! well for me it does ! was a good 5
days but too bad we didn't hope down to the beach ! still good fun !